


Champagne for My Real Friends, Real Pain for My Sham Friends

by redroses100



Series: Fall Out Boyfriends [5]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Anal Fingering, Cute boys, Drinking, Drunkenness, Friendship, Hand Jobs, Love, M/M, Namie's Character Fic, Not Beta Read, Oral Sex, Orgasms, Rimming, Sexual Content, and cute friendship shit, good friend Izaya, loosely based on what i'm like drunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2019-04-22 02:10:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14298483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redroses100/pseuds/redroses100
Summary: “Why are you canceling? Again?”“I need to appease the my secretary. Work has been too busy recently, I need her functioning. I can’t risk letting her spiral even further down her hole of bitterness and self pity.”“This is the third time we’ve rescheduled this month.”“I know. I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”“You’d better.”OR Namie has been feeling a little neglected by her boss recently and demands a night out with him!





	Champagne for My Real Friends, Real Pain for My Sham Friends

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! it's been a while! *sweats nervously* please don't hurt me...  
> i know the last fic i added for this series kinda went pear shaped, and if you were there for that before i deleted it, i apologize for betraying your trust like that. but alas! none of that betrayal here! just good old fashioned drunk shenanigans and morning sex! let's get back to the good old days of fluff and developing relationship shit!   
> Per the usual, this is not beta read. sorry for mistakes!

“Were you planning on actually getting work done today, or are you too busy fawning over your boyfriend?”

I’ve come to the realization in the last few weeks that Namie is actually ten times more savage than I first believed. She doesn’t even seem ashamed of it. For instance, right now her nose is held high in the air with self righteousness while she continues her ritualistic filing system. She hasn’t even looked at me to gauge how offended I am by her statement.

I mean, I’m really not offended at all, but she doesn’t know that. Which means that basically, she just doesn’t care. I can’t decide if I admire this newest version of her, or detest it.

“I was thinking about doing something around noon, but then I changed my mind. I’m already having so much fun, after all.” I give her a snarky smile when she darts a quick glare up at me. “What’s crawled up your ass and died? Recently, that is. I don’t need the whole long list.”

“Shove it up your own ass.” She scoffs, her dark eyes rolling so hard I’m shocked I don’t feel the ground rumble with the force of her derision.

“Namie-san is so hostile. Have you been spending too much time with Shizu-chan or something?” I drawl. And this time her sneer is way more pointed. I guess I hit where it’s soft.

“Like he has any free time with you constantly throwing yourself at him.”

I raise an eyebrow at the bitterness in her tone. I have a feeling I know what’s going on. But that being said, I can’t pass up an opportunity to pester her. “You know Namie, if you wanted to have a shot at Shizu-chan, all you had to do was ask. We haven’t been a thing for very long ya know, I can still step back if you want to jump on that chiseled man body.”

Watching the light die from her eyes has always been one of my favorite pastimes. This time it’s especially satisfying though.

“Shut up, you ass!” She snarls, throwing down her armful of files and storming off towards the stairs- probably to retreat to the bathroom. I can’t help but to cackle as she goes- which definitely doesn’t help the situation right now. But sometimes I just gotta be mean.

Namie disappears upstairs for a good twenty minutes before gracing me with her returned presence. She looks a lot calmer, but she’s obviously still pissed. I sigh as she stoically continues her filing.

“If you were feeling neglected, you could have told me.” I murmur, dropping the teasing from my tone for once. She pauses and glares over at me. But it’s only a halfhearted glare. Beneath the superficial anger and bitterness is something she’d probably be ashamed to admit was sadness.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Namie snaps. I give her a look that might be a little more patronizing than is strictly called for, but she only frowns.

“Do you want to like…go out for drinks or something?” It’s an awkward idea. I’ve never spent recreational time outside of work with Namie. But I guess she’s my friend, and I guess I haven’t really been around here a lot lately. So recreational time might be required to make her feel better.

At first she looks disgusted with the idea. But after a long stretch of tense silence she nods. “Okay.” I say quickly, tapping my fingers on my desk. “I have no idea where to go for drinks.”

“I know someplace.” She tells me, sounding as embarrassed by this as I feel.

“Good! You can pick up the tab too.” I grin devilishly at her. For half a second she looks like she wants to call the whole thing off. I cackle again. “Just kidding, of course.”

I stand with a dramatic stretch and snap my laptop shut. “Finish up your filing. I’ll go take a shower.” And figure out some way to cancel my plans with Shizuo while I’m at it. We’ve both been busy enough that spending time together comes in any spare, sparse moment available. For how much Namie is complaining, I really haven’t been able to see my…see Shizuo in a while.

So calling off our first real dinner in a month isn’t going to make him happy. But I think he’ll understand. I have to keep Namie happy, I rely on her for a lot. And…I guess she’s my friend or something, so he has to understand that I need to make time for her sometimes too.

That’s something my dumb monster can grasp, right? Hell, he might be able to grasp it better than I can at this point.

I just don’t fully know where this came from. Yeah, Namie has been in a bad mood all month, but why now? When Shizuo and I have been “officially dating” for almost a year!

Maybe Seiji has been ignoring her too much lately, and she’s pinning me with all the abandonment issues she’s been suppressing. Gross.

But what can I do? I need her. And I think I’m supposed to like her? Friends are supposed to like each other, right? Whatever. Either way, one night of drinking with my secretary is necessary for the whole operation to run smoothly. So I gotta do what I gotta do.

I shoot Shizuo a text before climbing in the shower. By the time I’m done and wrapped in a towel I have a missed call and two missed texts from the man. With a deep sigh I dial his number and browse my closet distractedly.

“You’re canceling again?” Shizuo demands immediately when he picks up.

“Hello to you too- lover, dear, light of my life.” I drawl scathingly. He scoffs so violently I can just imagine the fear it would inspire it anyone who happened to be around him on the street. It’s a nice thought.

“Why are you canceling? Again?”

“I need to appease the my secretary. Work has been too busy recently, I need her functioning. I can’t risk letting her spiral even further down her hole of bitterness and self pity.” I glance behind me compulsively before I say it, just to make sure said secretary isn’t lingering where she can hear my conversation.

Shizuo grunts, obviously unhappy, but also obviously understanding. “This is the third time we’ve rescheduled this month.” He grumbles, like I need to be reminded. I sigh.

“I know. I’m sorry.” I admit begrudgingly. He sighs too.

“It’s fine.” It’s obviously not fine. I pause in my browsing to frown at the clothes in front of me- since Shizuo isn’t here to fill that space.

“I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”

He grumbles again, but this time it sounds more for show than anything. “You’d better.” His pouting is always so cute. It’s almost impossible for me to resist teasing him when he gets like this.

“Well, I could always suck you off. That usually puts you in a good mood, no matter what.” I purr, a wicked smirk curling up my lip even though he can’t see it.

There’s silence from his side of the line for the longest moment before he clears his throat. “I’m not doing this right now.” He states. But he hasn’t hung up yet, so I think he’s lying.

“What, are you in public or something, Shizu-chan? That never stopped us before you know. Like when I jerked you off under the table at that fancy restaurant. And when you fucked me in the bathroom of the cinema.” I list, only stopping because he hisses at me to shut up.

“I’m on a job Izaya.”

“But you answered when I called? I’m flattered darling.” Strictly speaking there’s no need for me to gesture wildly and flutter my eyelashes, since he’s not here to appreciate it. But it’s really for my own amusement at this point.

Shizuo growls a terse, “Goodbye.” But still doesn’t hang up.

“See you soon, Shizu-chan. Bring lube.” I encourage. This time when he starts to mutter and growl, he does hang up. But not before he hears me laugh at his expense. I turn my screen off and flip through my closet with more determination.

Any conversation with Shizuo, even a short one filled with teasing and bitterness, feels rejuvenating for me. Suddenly a long night entertaining Namie seems a lot less formidable.

I’m not sure if she feels the same. In fact, when I skip down the stairs all dressed and sparkly clean, Namie doesn’t even look up from filing. She’s so intently ignoring me that I have to wonder if she regrets agreeing to this.

If she wants to cancel I wish she would just say so. Then I could call Shizuo back and pester him with the lie that I brushed off Namie for our plans. He would just feel so bad about that. I could probably get him to do anything I said if I rode the guilt trip long enough.

But then Namie looks up at me, and her face is set in determination, and I know she’s going to go along with this new and scary concept.

Friendship isn’t exactly a strong suit for either of us.

“So where are we going?” I ask, using my chipper tone that for the most part she hates. Right now she doesn’t even raise an eyebrow.

“There’s a bar a few streets away. It’s trashy enough that you’ll fit right in.” Savage.

“Is it dimly lit, like your will to live?” I ask sweetly. All I get for it is the tiniest glare. Namie sorts away the last of her files and stands to collect her things. I wander to the door to pull on my shoes.

“You should leave your jacket. I don’t want to get chased down the street by angry gangsters.” She demands when I reach for the fur lined coat. I raise an eyebrow, glancing towards the windows where I have a perfect view of how hard the wind is tearing through the city. It’s probably cold outside. It is April, after all.

((in the distance you can hear me crying from Arizona, where it’s already 99 fucking degrees, save me-))

“Namie-san is so selfish.” I sigh, but settle for pulling on Shizuo’s hoodie he has a tendency to forget. It’s way too long on me, and wide as well. But it’s cozy and I wear it more often than he would probably prefer.

“Like you haven’t said that before.” She murmurs dismissively, straightening up her desk and joining me at the door. I lock up behind us while she summons the elevator.

“So do you frequent this bar often? I know your life is a raging dumpster fire, but you probably shouldn’t add ‘alcoholic’ to your list of redeeming qualities. It would really put off anyone who managed to get past the ‘actually in love with your brother’ part.”

“Yeah, because ‘self destructive asshole with a long history of violence’ is so much better.” Namie drawls right back at me. It takes a lot to get her upset after all the time she’s already spent with me- this I know. But usually Seiji is the line for her. Weird.

We’re almost to the lobby when she speaks again. “Can we not talk about Seiji or Heiwajima-san tonight? It kind of defeats the purpose.”

I’m about to ask what exactly the purpose is then. But I knew from the beginning. She just wants to hang out, in an informal setting. But Namie, much like myself, lacks any major social skill to communicate that. Instead she’s trying to narrow down the conversations- pointing them away from things that normally cause arguments and bitterness.

It’s a good idea. I just don’t know if I’ll be able to accomplish it. I hope I can. I don’t want to get slapped tonight. “Sure.”

Namie breathes a sigh of relief and her shoulders drop a few inches. She’s really, actually pleased by this charade of normalcy! Namie, of all people, wanting to be just like every other girl in Shinjuku- going out for drinks with a friend/co-worker. It’s bizarre!

She takes the lead when we reach the street, I follow along obediently as we weave through the crowd. Normally it parts for me. But without my trademark jacket I blend in a little too well with a crowd. I’m just another Japanese man.

Which is a little humbling. But mostly annoying. After the third time I’m shoved by a hurried businessman, I’m even considering drawing my switchblade and making people move.

But like she can sense it, Namie’s hand snaps out and squeezes my wrist. She tugs me closer as we pass a big group of schoolgirls, so I don’t get shoved to the other side of the pavement. I glare at the oblivious girls as they go giggling past. “This is insufferable.” I sigh.

“Being in public?” Namie snorts.

“Being invisible in public.” I hiss, again itching for my knife when a burly man barrels his way past me. “I’ve become accustomed to a certain amount of fear. And personal space.”

“Don’t be a baby. This is what your normal humans deal with every day.” She brushes past my bitterness without hesitation. “We’re almost there anyway.”

I sulk along after her the rest of the way to the bar. My joke about her being a regular customer is quickly put to rest when I see how awkward she looks walking into the loud space. She doesn’t even know where to go immediately, so I have to take her arm and tote her along to the actual bar section of the establishment.

“You don’t get out much, do you Namie-san?” I snicker, earning myself a glower.

“This from the man who was just whining about being outside.” She gestures for the bartender before I can think of some scathing response. She’s not skilled at ordering at a bar, that much is obvious, but she’ll get no help from me there. I only really know what Shizuo mixes well, after all.

However it would be against the rules of the evening to bring that up.

“Um two cocktails that are not too sweet and…some shots of whiskey?” She stumbles through our order, looking relieved when the bartender merely nods and goes to work. He probably deals with requests like this a lot.

We’re both transfixed watching him- and I will admit he does have a feline, fluid grace that Shizuo’s never had, even when he was a bartender too. It’s only once he’s done making a drinks and Namie and I have each done one of our shots that we turn to each other directly again.

“So, what do we talk about?” I ask her, tracing the rim of my drink idly to keep my hands busy at least. I don’t want to pull out my phone and insult her, but I don’t feel like sitting still either.

“You mean you don’t have any ideas? I find that hard to believe.” Namie raises and eyebrow and her glass. I think about telling her that it’s not a race. But honestly, the faster she gets drunk, the faster the night will be over. And when things are as awkward and stilted as they are between us, that’s not a bad thing.

“Most of our normal topics of conversation are banned for the evening. And the ones that aren’t might get us arrested if we talk about them in public. So I guess that leaves small chat. Unless you have something real on your mind you want to talk about?” I lay it out as bluntly as I can. Which normally she appreciates.

But I can see that I’ve once again struck gold with my words. She suddenly can’t look at me. And she takes another big sip of her cocktail, while mine is still untouched.

“I know we’re not friends.” Namie starts, staring into her drink. “But…you’re the closest thing I have to one. That’s why I was so concerned while the whole Heiwajima Debacle was happening.”

I snort a laugh. “Is that what you refer to it as?”

“We all do.” She deadpans. “What I’m trying to say is that…I think of you as a friend. But only to myself. I’d never admit to anyone.”

“You admitted it to me.” I point out. She flushes very lightly. “You must be a real light weight. Only one shot and two sips and you’re already divulging your deep, dark secrets.”

“I don’t care about admitting it to you. You hardly matter compared to everyone else I could tell.” Namie insists, nose in the air.

“How sweet of you to say.” I drawl. She huffs, her already pinched expression only pinching more. I stop circling the rim of my drink. “I think of you as a friend too. On rare occasions when I’m feeling sentimental, or I’m drunk.” I hadn’t been intending on admitting it. But she just looked so pitiful. It made me think of how Shizuo looks when he pouts, and I couldn’t help it.

Namie glances at me from the very corner of her eye. I have no doubt that she doesn’t believe me. But I try to hold her eye to really communicate how serious I am. And after a few seconds her shoulder ease some of their permanent tension.

“Naturally I’ll deny that to anyone else who asks.” I state, finally taking a sip of my drink. Namie smirks.

“Naturally.”

~~~

“What I don’t understand is why you like him in the first place!” Namie slams her empty glass down on the bar as if it’s the physical exclamation mark at the end of her very loud shout. I cringe, expecting the glass to break, but it doesn’t. “He was always so mean to you! From the very start.”

“How would you know?” I huff, only slurring a little. We broke our rule about what topics were off limits fairly quickly. Namie has been ranting about Shizu-chan for like an hour, at least. But whatever.

“Kishitani-san told me.” She admits in a mumbled blur. I almost miss it, between the mumbling and trying to count the number of glasses in front of me. I keep missing some and I have to start over, but then I lose track of where I am again and then I have to start over and- “He told me Shizuo didn’t like you even when he first saw you!”

“He was stupid.” I pout, and she leans onto her propped up palm like she’s waiting for a story. With a frustrated groan I flop back in my seat. “What he told me was that he was too dumb to realize his boner for me was because he liked me and not because he wanted to kill me.”

“That is dumb.” Namie agrees. “So why do you like him?” She pesters. I groan again, knocking back the rest of my drink and slamming the glass down almost as hard as she did. She doesn’t even blink.

“I dunno, I just like him! He’s different and unpredictable and doesn’t… doesn’t…” The words won’t come to me.

“You just like his dick.” She decides for me.

“I mean, you’re not wrong. But you’re wrong.” I sigh. “It’s not just about the sex.”

“Seems like it’s a lot about the sex.”

“The sex is great!” I nod, and she nods and we both nod at each other for a really long time before I shake my head and put my train of thought back on track. “But it’s not just the sex! I like him! He’s really weird and dorky and has these moments where he’s really calm and sweet and I like to be around him!”

“Gross you’re getting your girl talk all over me.” Namie mutters with an exaggerated shiver. I shove her shoulder, but it’s a weak shove.

“Like you’re any better when you write sonnets about Seiji-kun.”

Namie’s whole face melts into something wistful and longing. “He’s such a good boy, you know? He’s so respectful and smart! And resourceful too! He’s really, really good.”

“Try not to get a boner here, Namie.” I request. She ignores me. Or maybe she doesn’t even hear me, as caught up in thinking about her brother as she is. “Why don’t you find someone who’s like Seiji-kun then?”

Her cackle is pretty close to full out demented. “There is no one like my Seiji. He’s perfection itself. Everyone else would just be a poor imitation.”

“You’re telling me you’ve never had a crush on anyone else besides Seiji-kun?” I prod, leaning in closer to her space. She doesn’t react at all. Which is weird. I always thought she was a big believer of personal space. Normally so am I.

“A crush? Sure. But I’ve only ever loved Seiji.” She insists. Then frowns. “Probably like you with Shizuo.”

I feel my face getting hotter. It’s an uncomfortable feeling when I’m this drunk. But I hardly even like admitting my feelings for Shizuo to him, let alone to someone else. Let alone someone else who’s also important to me in some way.

“Can’t relate, but okay.” I lie instead. I gesture for the bartender to bring us more drinks, but the clear liquid he sets in front of us is decidedly less alcoholic than I’d like. “What the fuck is this?” I ask, in honest confusion.

“It’s called water.” He snorts, pushing the cup back towards me when I push it away.

“We probably should.” Namie begrudgingly agrees with the guy, sipping sullenly from her cup. I mutter, but do the same. The bartender wanders off, pleased with himself. I can tell from his irritating little grin.

“Do you think he’ll let us drink more if we finish this?” Namie asks me softly. I shrug, eyeing the guy where he’s serving another couple across the bar. I flick my eyes back towards my friend in time to watch her pour her cup into the fake bamboo pot we’re sitting beside. I snort with laughter. “Shh! He’ll hear you, dumbass.” She insists, swiping my cup next.

Namie peers towards the bartender and waits until she’s sure he’s not gonna look at us to pour out my water too. We spend a little time pretending to sip from empty glasses before calling him back over.

There’s a few moments where I think he might catch onto us, but in the end he allows us to order a few more shots and then moves on to his other needy customers.

“You, my dear Namie, are a fucking genius.” I grin, clinking my shot glass against hers. We toss back the shots at the same time, mine going down with a shudder. I’ve definitely lost my skill with shots. Shizuo doesn’t like drinking so much. No time like the present to get good at it again though!

“One of us has to be.” Namie purrs. “So. Tell me again about how it’s not just sex.”

~~~

“I bet we could totally slay the karaoke.” I rumble, staring wistfully towards the private rooms further back in the bar. Namie giggle- actually fucking giggles. It’s an almost eerie sound.

“M’not singing with you.” She shakes her head, her hair flicking me where I’m laying my face down on the bar. “You’d beat me.”

“You dunno that. What if you actually sing good? Then I’d be so inadequate. Well…more inadequate.”

“Why do you do that? You’re always doing that you know.” A sharp finger prods at my nose. I bat her hand away. Or I aim to do that. I think I just end up waving at the air between us.

“Stahp it…”

“So damn mean to yourself. That’s why you and Shizuo get along.” She talks over me dismissively. I want to remind her- yet again- that she’s not my mother and doesn’t have to worry about that stuff. Especially because even my actual mother isn’t all that worried about that stuff anymore. Fucking Christmas.

“Get off my dick Namie-san.” I drawl instead.

“Like there’s even much to climb onto to begin with. Is that why you’re the bottom? You don’t have the…you can’t compare with his monster?” She giggles again, clearly getting a little mixed up with her words. I giggle too.

“Like anyone could compare with his monster.” I smirk contentedly, thinking of it. Thinking of Shizuo’s dick. It’s a great thing to think of.

“Try not t’get a boner here, Iz-a-ya.” She mocks, repeating my words from earlier. I would probably feel indignant if I wasn’t so damn impressed that she even remembered them. I didn’t even remember them, until she mocked them in perfect cadence and everything.

“You’d just love that, wouldn’t you. At least then there’d be something for you to jump off of.” I goad. We both break out into giggles at nearly the same moment this time.

“Sounds like you two had fun.” I jerk upright at the voice, spinning in my seat to beam at Shizuo. He raises an eyebrow at me, clearly unimpressed.

“Heiwajima-san?” Namie sounds confused. Which is fair, because I am also confused. But I don’t care! I just latch onto Shizuo around his waist, having to lean over a little to do so because these stupid bar chairs are so high.

“Yagiri-san.” Shizuo nods politely to her. She scowls.

“Did you call him?” She demands of me. I shake my head- well, more accurately I rub my face all over Shizuo’s vest in a vaguely ‘no’ motion.

“I called him.” I peek behind me, towards the bartender. Who hands my phone to Shizuo, along with Namie’s. When did he get our phones? Did we give them to him? I don’t remember.

Clearly Namie is having the same crisis of memory I am, because she pats her pockets and then her purse like she’s trying to make sure she doesn’t still have it on her. Shizuo puts them both away, one of his hands starting to run soothingly through my hair. I purr.

“Thanks for the call.” He nods to the bartender, who nods back. “Did they already settle the tab?”

“And then some. They were very generous. Here. The change.” He offers Shizuo some vaguely crumpled bills from his apron pocket. Shizuo turns him down.

“Keep it. After serving them all night, I’m sure you deserve it.” He insists. I want to argue that it’s my money he’s offering willy nilly. But he’s probably right. He’s usually right. And if anyone deserves giant tips, it’s people who have to deal with drunk me. “As for you two, it’s closing time.” He rumbles down at us.

“Noooo…” I whine. Namie only points her nose in the air, clearly upset with him interrupting the evening. With a sigh, Shizuo kinda squats to dislodge my arms, and then before I can whine, he lifts me over his shoulder. When he has me settled, he wraps his other arm around Namie’s middle and lifts her so she’s tucked under his armpit against his side. And shockingly, she doesn’t even react to it really.

“Thank you.” He tells the bartender. Who nods one more time. I wave to him as Shizuo starts walking to the door.

“Where’re we…” Namie mumbles.

“Do you know how to get home from here?” Shizuo asks her. A noise resembling, ‘harrumph’ actually leaves her throat.

“She’s a that way.” I point to my left, and Shizuo obediently follows the direction. “Namie-san you’re so drunk.” I chuckle, stretching my leg to the side to dig the toe of my shoe into her side. She jerks and slaps my calf to make me stop. Shizuo sighs between us.

“Where am I going?” He demands of me, adjusting me on his shoulder to get my attention.

“Where are any of us really going, Shizu-chan?” I sigh wistfully. Shizuo’s sigh is more defeated. “Keep going that way.”

It’s very quiet for a few minutes. Or what feels like a few minutes. Because suddenly I’m being jostled again and put on my fee to lean heavily against Shizuo. He cups my face to get me to look at him, but it still takes my eyes a few seconds to focus in on his face.

“I need you to help me get her home.” He pleads with me. I flick my eyes around the vaguely blurry neighborhood we’re standing in. It takes a while for it to look familiar, but luckily we haven’t gone off course.

I can even see the rise of her apartment building from here. I point at it and mumble off her apartment number. Shizuo grunts and lifts me back over his shoulder to start walking again.

I fade in and out of consciousness for the rest of the walk. I take notice when we get to the apartment building, and when he steps into the elevator, and even when he stops in front of her door. Shizuo puts me down again so he has two hands to help Namie open her door. I slouch against the hallway wall while he takes her inside and puts her to bed.

“She’s asleep.” He reports when he comes back outside. “Do you have a key or anything, to lock the door?” I fish around in my pockets, feebly offering him the spare key Namie entrusted to me. He keeps hold of the key ring afterwards.

“Shizu-cha-” I’m cut off by surprise when he picks me up again, but at least this time I’m not thrown over a shoulder. Shizuo keeps me tucked against his chest as he navigates back towards the elevator. “Sorry.” I mumble into his vest.

“For what?” He grumbles, using his elbow to hit the button.

“I canceled our plans and then got so drunk you had to be called to pick Namie and me up.” I remind him. His fond chuckle is not the response I was expecting to that.

“I’m glad you got wasted.” He informs me, kissing the top of my head. “It gave me an excuse to see you, even though you canceled our plans.” I can feel my cheeks burning. I curl my fists into his shirt and bite hard on my lip to keep an ungainly noises from slipping out. He’s so…arghhh! “Let’s get you home.” He rumbles when the elevator door slides open.

“Okay.” I agree, feeling myself fall asleep as soon as the rhythm of his walking sets in.

~~~

“Izaya do you need anything?” I peek between my heavy eyelids at Shizuo while he lowers me down onto my bed. I don’t want to let him go though, and I don’t. My fingers stay clenched in his vest even when he tries to straighten up.

“You.” I sigh, tugging at him. He doesn’t budge. But he does smile indulgently.

“Alright, I’ll stay the night then. But you have to let me go first. I need to lock the door and stuff.” He tries to coax me. I clench my fingers tighter.

“No. Don’t care. Want you.” I grumble, reaching with one hand for his bow tie. It comes loose easily. Likely he was in the process of taking it off already when he got the call from the barman.

He grips my wrist before I can move on to any buttons. “Izaya not tonight. You’re drunk.” He whispers soothingly. I pout.

“So? Drunk people can’t fuck or something?” His eyes grow a little more hooded as he smirks fondly down at me.

“They shouldn’t. You’re not in full control of yourself right now.”

“I’m always in control of myself!” I deny quickly. He patiently continues to try untangling my hands from his shirt. “Come on Shizu-chaaaaan! Want you inside me. Want to feel you.” I reach for his crotch, but he’s too quick, grabbing my wrist and pinning it to the pillow beside my head. “That’s more like it.”

With a sigh, Shizuo finally dislodges my other hand and quickly steps back from the bed. I jerk up to follow him, but my head spins and I have to lay back down. Ugh. That was a bad idea.

“I’ll get you a bucket. In case you feel like you need to puke.” Shizuo soothes me from somewhere beyond my blurry vision. I want to be mad at him. Except…I’m not really sure why. Somewhere in my head rush I’ve lost the reason.

He putters around my room for a little while- or what I assume is a little while. Time is a distorted illusion on the best of days, let alone now! But finally the lights click off and a few seconds later I feel him curl around me as he lays down at my side.

A few fruitless wiggles later and I lay back against his chest defeated, unable to gain the upper hand like this.

“Go to sleep Izaya-kun. I’ll be here when you wake up.” Shizuo promises. And as much as I want to be angry with him- though I still don’t know why- I can’t deny that it sounds like a good idea. Sleep just…sounds so good. Especially if it’s with him.

~~~

It’s nice and cozy when I wake up. Cozy and dark. Which is rare when Shizuo stays over. He always opens the curtains to let the sun in, saying that the view of the sunrise from my apartment is unparalleled. I hate it. It’s irritating and bright. Which makes the darkness of my room this morning all the more refreshing.

For half a second I panic, wondering if Shizuo even stayed the night. Surely if he did, he would have opened the curtains!

But I twist in place and find myself eye level with his throat and I quickly calm down. He did stay. It makes an unwarranted wave of warmth rush over me. It makes me forget about the crustiness of my eyes and the dull ache in the back of my head.

Well…it almost makes me forget. Luckily I don’t get very bad hangovers. For how drunk I got, I should be rocking in place begging for pain meds. I’m sure Namie is experiencing a little of that this morning. But I don’t even take a second glance at the bottle of pills Shizuo left on my bedside table last night. Instead I look at him and ride through the distant pounding in my brain. It’s worth it. He’s beautiful.

“The staring is creepy, you know.” Shizuo’s abrupt mumble makes me jump a little and bury myself under the sheet draped loosely over us. A warm chuckle and his paw of a hand settling on my covered head is his response.

“I didn’t think you were awake.” I tell him, pretty needlessly. Obviously I didn’t think that, otherwise I wouldn’t be staring at him with heart eyes. Motherfucker.

Shizuo pets the sheet separating his hand from my hair. But the sensation still carries through, giving me goosebumps. “How are you feeling?” He asks seriously. I shrug noncommittally.

“Fine. Better than Namie, I’m sure.”

Another chuckle. “She was more prickly than usual. Should I assume that’s how she really feels towards me?” He suggests.

I’m glad he can’t see my face, and the blush stretched across it. I always lied to him, assuring him that Namie was just unpleasant to everyone. It wasn’t personal. But I’m sure he saw through that last night. She wasn’t exactly a beacon of warmth towards him, even though she was inebriated and therefore softer at the edges.

“No.” I mutter, a little too weak and a little too late for it to be believable.

“So reassuring.” He deadpans. “It’s okay. I know why she doesn’t like me. And that’s fair, since I was such an ass to you at first.” I gnaw at my bottom lip, not wanting to talk about this right now. Or ever. “She’s a good friend.”

“Can I suck you off?” I blurt out. Anything to make him stop talking about Namie. Except now he’s not saying anything. And his hand has stopped absentmindedly petting my head.

Shizuo tugs at the sheet, trying to pull it away from my face. But I only burrow further down, wiggling away from his sight. He only stops trying when I’m hovering over his crotch. “I can’t look at you this morning?” He demands, actually sounding like he’s pouting.

“I look gross.” I huff bitterly, toying with the waistband of his boxers.

“Really? I thought you looked cute.” His hands settle on me through the sheet again, feeling for the lines of my face and then creeping down. One of his palms rests on my neck where it must look like it’s bulging from the hood of his jacket pooling there. “I didn’t know you wore my jacket when I’m not here.”

“I can take it off.” I offer immediately.

“No, it’s okay.” He insists. “You wear it better than I do, anyway. You can make any damn thing look sexy.”

My face feels hot again. I pull his boxers down, catching his dick in my hand when it escapes. A breathy huff comes from above me, but it’s not a bad sound. And he doesn’t try to make me stop, either with words or with actions.

I start to stroke up and down his dick, waiting for it to fill with blood before I start sucking him. When I do take him in my mouth, I earn a soft groan. “Lemme see, Izaya…” Shizuo mumbles, kneading at the sheet against the back of my scalp. But he doesn’t try to pull it away. I know he wants me to say yes first.

I shake my head, sinking down further on his dick to make up for the refusal. But it’s still not much so far.

It’s hard enough to take him all the way in when I’m not just waking up after drinking all night. But this is a matter of principle! I slowly make my way down, letting myself adjust while still keeping him in the mood by licking, sucking, and stroking while I get used to the shape of him in my mouth.

He’s panting by the time I get my lips to meet with my fist where it’s circled around his cock. “Fuck…Izaya I want to see you…” He asks again, sounding almost pleading this time.

And I just…can’t help myself when he starts pleading. I give him a minuscule nod, but that’s all it takes before he’s ripping the sheet off of the both of us.

Shizuo buries his hands in my hair, pushing it away from my face so he can really look at me. I keep my eyes down, trying to focus on not choking on him instead of the intensity of his gaze on me. If I pay too much attention to the fact that he’s watching everything, I might lose my nerve. And I don’t want to do that.

“You’re so fucking beautiful…” Shizuo rumbles. My face feels like it’s on fire. I clench my eyes shut and swallow compulsively around his dick to deal with the knot of emotion that’s trying to build there. Shizuo groans, long and loud at the feeling. “Goddamn it…Izaya…”

I love his voice. I love it when he says my name, especially like this. Even after last night, he’s still saying shit like that and saying my name like that and I just…fuck I love him.

A moan of my own rises from my chest, making Shizuo wriggle beneath me. It’s always a head rush, the feeling of power that comes with making him desperate. And right now, he’s getting pretty fucking desperate.

He always gets more vocal when he’s getting close. And right now there’s a stream of embarrassing endearments coming from his mouth as I work mine around him. He can be so mortifying. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

“I’m gonna…” Shizuo tugs gently at my hair in warning. My next suck is firm and I twist my grip on his dick just enough for him to feel it and just like that he’s coming. I swallow around his dick, ignoring the taste of it- it’s no worse than the day old taste of too many cocktails that I woke up with in my mouth.

He tugs at my hair again when he’s starting to get oversensitive, and I reluctantly pull back. I don’t look at him though, keeping my eyes on his softening cock. Or I do until he curls his finger under my chin to bring my face up towards his.

“Good morning.” He grins cheekily at me. It’s beyond my power to deny him a smile in return.

“Shut up.” I chuckle. He leans in to kiss lightly at my lips.

“How are you feeling this morning? Headache?” His thumb rubs circles against my temple as he asks. It doesn’t really make a different to the dull ache, but it is soothing. I like it.

“Not really. I don’t get bad hangovers.” I assure him. He hums a soft, pleased noise.

“Not nauseous either?” He asks thoughtfully. I shake my head. “Good.” Before I can wonder why his voice has suddenly dropped a few octaves, he’s pouncing on me, pinning me down to the mattress to shove his tongue in my mouth. And despite my self consciousness about my mouth tasting horrible right now, he doesn’t seem to mind.

Shizuo kisses me like an alcoholic looking for scraps from last night. He’s so intense that I hardly even realize he’s pulling off my shorts until they’re whisked straight off my ankles. I gasp into his mouth and he devours the sound.

“Shizu…” I sound more needy than I’m generally proud of. But the way he looks at me, the way his eyes look so blown black with lust, is worth it. I shiver under his gaze and he growls in his chest.

“I’m gonna eat you whole one of these days.” He tells me. And I would be amused if I wasn’t so turned on. Especially when his sly smirk stretches over his face. “Think I’ll start now. Get a taste for it.” He decides.

“If you wanted to suck me off you could’ve just- eep!” I’m not proud of this noise either. But he’s caught me by surprise again, this time grabbing me under my knees to push my legs up and apart, spreading me to him. But he doesn’t waste time admiring the view, or whatever. He dives straight in, darting down to swipe his tongue against my entrance before I can even consider it as a possibility. “Oh fuck-”

His tongue feels weird down there, it’s one of the few things we haven’t done yet- though he’s definitely suggested it before. I’ve always thought it was too gross of a concept to let him do it. But I guess I am still sluggish from last night, because I didn’t even think he might be suggesting this!

“Shizu-chan stop, it’s gross!” I whimper, squeezing fitfully at the sheets under me.

“No it’s not, don’t worry about that.” He spares a moment to soothe me before jumping right back in, licking at my entrance like it’s not the most disgusting place on my body.

A shaky cry wrenches from my lips when his tongue presses harder against my rim, slipping inside of me without much effort. Fuck, it’s so weird! It’s so good! How can something that makes me shiver with revulsion also make me shiver with pleasure? I don’t understand!

“Shizu-chaaan!” I groan, arching helplessly. He’s as insistent with this as he just was with kisses. He’ll lick and suck at my rim for a little bit, then tongue fuck me for a little bit before switching back, but there’s no kind of pattern. Nothing for me to wrap my mind around.

I cover my mouth, trying to stop the steady flow of gasps and moans from escaping my lips. It doesn’t really work, but it is somewhat comforting having something to hold onto- even if it’s just my own face. I squeeze hard at my cheek, pressing down on my lips almost as hard as Shizuo presses his tongue inside me.

My eyes flutter shut when he presses a finger inside me along with his tongue. It seeks out my prostate immediately, stroking up over it while he falls back to sucking noisily at my rim. I feel like I’m going to choke on my own saliva at this rate.

“Is it good, Izaya?” Shizuo asks, his voice a rasp in his throat that I feel throughout my body. I nod, unable to form coherent speech. He smirks from between my legs. My dick twitches at the sight.

Another finger joins his first against my prostate. He licks around and between them, driving whimpers and whines from my throat with each stroke of his fingertips and tongue. I can’t believe him. I can’t believe this is really happening. It feels like a nightmare and a fantasy combines.

“So fucking beautiful…” Shizuo rumbles, seconds before his palm circles my dick. I want to deny it, the instinctive argument is just behind my lips. But if I opened my mouth now, all that would come out would be cries and begging. I’m so fucking close, I feel it through my whole body! I just need- “Izaya…”

The way he says my fucking name, like it’s some kind of prayer. It sends heat racing along already fried nerves. I writhe under his care, coming so hard I cease to exist for a moment.

My return to reality isn’t as sweet as normal. Yeah, I’m still riding waves of sweet pleasure, but my orgasm has unfortunately exacerbated the small headache I had and turned it into a real nuisance. I groan in my throat, and Shizuo chuckles.

“Was it that bad?” He asks, nuzzling my cheek. Now that he mentions it, between my cheeks feels so weird and slippery. But it’s a reminder of the confusing pleasure that preceded it and I can’t say I completely hate it. I shake my head.

“No. It was good.” I admit softly. “Just…headache.”

“Oooh.” Shizuo cringes guiltily. “Do you want something for that? Meds? Water?” He suggest. I shake my head again.

“Just lay with me a while instead.” I request. He’s still for a few seconds before a warm chuckle rumbles through his throat. Shizuo curls around me again, this time keeping us chest to chest. When he’s comfortable he starts brushing through my hair with his fingers, laying kisses to the crown of my head. I scrunch my nose up. “Gross. I know where your mouth has been.”

“You need a shower anyway. You’re sweaty. And you smell like alcohol.” He dismisses.

“Oh well then, by all means, now I can smell like alcohol and my asshole.” I grumble. He laughs. “Shizu-chan is such an animal sometimes.” I huff. He doesn’t so much as growl at the insult.

“You like it.” He sounds very sure of himself. I grumble some more because I hate it when he’s right. “I love you, Izaya.” Shizuo whispers into my hair. I stare at his chest for a long moment before closing my eyes in a parody of sleep.

“I love Shizu-chan too.” I admit, even softer than him. He rumbles happily, curling around me even more, softly petting me as I debate going back to sleep.

If I didn’t have work today I totally would.

“Oh shit, Namie!” I jerk up immediately upon the realization. I scramble over Shizuo, who grunts unhappily but lets me go.

I manage to pull on some pants in my mad scramble to the door of my room, but I’m sure I look less than presentable as I trip down the stairs. Namie is at her desk, with a large cup of coffee and some sunglasses on to block the sunlight through the windows. So basically I have no idea if she’s looking at me or not. But I know she sees me, at least.

“You’re loud.” She states bluntly when I reach the bottom of the stairs.

“I wasn’t trying to be.” I mutter, rubbing my face tiredly. “I didn’t know you were here. I didn’t know what time it was.” I offer feebly. She shrugs.

“I was late to work. You can dock my pay.” She informs me.

“Out late partying with your friends, Namie-san?” I grin, leaning against her desk. She peeks over the top of her sunglasses, looking less than impressed. “Let’s do that again sometime.” I suggest. She cringes.

“Whatever you say, Izaya.” She drawls. But she can’t fool me. Before she pushes her glasses back up I can see the interested shine in them. “Now get to work.” She commands. Ah yes. Everything back to normal, as it should be.

One night of sacrifice for the peace of the workplace. Not a bad exchange at all.

“And just who is the boss here?”

“Sometimes I wonder.”

“Shut up Namie.”


End file.
